


this is the song you gave me

by notmarklee



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Established Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Inspired by Shigatsu wa Kimi no Uso | Your lie in April, M/M, Mark is a musician
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-12 20:41:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29765310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notmarklee/pseuds/notmarklee
Summary: I won't give up. That’s what you taught me. We play until we have nothing left.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Comments: 6
Kudos: 19





	this is the song you gave me

**Author's Note:**

> if you’ve watched the anime ‘your lie in april’ then you’ll probably recognise this <3

_ You’re looking down again. _

It hurts.

There’s a burning in his chest and his lungs are filled with the flames.

He’s conflicted. He doesn’t want to be here, yet he also can't think of anything he’d rather do more than play these notes for Donghyuck. He lifts his head. 

Donghyuck isn’t here, but Mark isn’t sure he is either. Even as he pounds the keys of the piano as hard as he can, Mark isn’t quite sure where he is. Where he’s supposed to be.

_ With you. _

There is no coherent rhythm, no substantial tune, but the audience’s reaction is the farthest thing from Mark’s mind in this current moment. He moves his hands for the sole purpose of making music for the people, the person, that brought him back to where he belonged. After he’d convinced himself that he’d never play again, that he’d never hear the notes, Donghyuck begged and screamed and cried until Mark sat in that chair and was reminded of the reason he existed.

Mark existed to make music. 

He had given up long before Donghyuck came along. Accepted his fate. He was done. 

_ I won't give up. That’s what you taught me. We play until we have nothing left. _

Donghyuck changed Mark in ways the others never would have been able to. Donghyuck understood the concept of fleeting time. Forevers only existed in fairytales. Together they created a world full of such magnificent sounds and claimed the stage as their own. The music sheets flew away with the wind the second the instruments made their music. These songs were their own. 

These songs were for them. 

Mark plays with such sincerity that the image of Donghyuck collapsing in his arms in the snow stutters in his mind for the first time. He gives himself that one meagre second to forget about the way Donghyuck gripped his sleeves and sobbed.

_ There is still so much I haven't learned about you! Where do you go when you’re happy? What’s your least favourite food? Who is the most important person in your life? _

_ Don’t leave me behind, Mark! _

Mark got called an idiot for falling in love with Donghyuck when they both knew they didn’t have much time left. Time together. As much as the thought of a world where Mark would no longer have this boy with golden skin at his side ripped his insides to shreds, at least Mark could be proud of the fact that he was playing not because he had to, but because he wanted to.

He wanted to play this song for Donghyuck more than anything he had ever wanted in his life. His fingers skim the keys, never missing a single note in the song. The audience is enthralled and Mark can only hope that Donghyuck is a part of it. Cheering him on just like he always did. 

Mark spares a single glance into that audience, and Donghyuck is nowhere to be seen. Instead, five other boys occupy the chairs in the front row with the proudest expressions Mark has ever been given. These are the people that gave him a place where he could be safe after years of danger. The people that brought him back to this moment. The ones that gave Mark a reason to dream again.

_ I’m playing because they’re here. They’re watching me. I can't let them down. _

He goes on. The song is almost over. If Mark was playing with his whole heart before, now he is playing with his entire being. His hands move so fast and so accurately across the keys and in return he is presented with a masterpiece. A masterpiece that is only given to him because of Donghyuck.

_ Look for me, and I’ll be there. _

Mark gives up searching for Donghyuck with his eyes. He closes them. His notes falter as soon as he stops looking at the keys but he doesn't care. The gasps of the audience do not phase him in the slightest. 

Donghyuck  _ is  _ here. Mark can feel his presence in every single bone in his body. His blood fills with warmth and suddenly the world doesn’t seem quite as unfortunate anymore.

Mark will go on. Mark will carry on for Donghyuck. Mark will live for him. Make him proud. 

It is right here that his promise to Donghyuck truly matters. 

_ We play until the end. _

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this in one sitting and haven’t actually reread it yet so !! yeah haha
> 
> hope you enjoyed :] 
> 
> twt: neodreamx


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